I have to say, this was a productive week for me. I got through a good portion of my flight stage requirements and was able to get caught up on some other school work. I actually made a short little list of things I’ve been putting off as well, and was able to scratch off a few things tonight. As productive as it was, I don’t have a lot going on in the creativity department of my head. Maybe it’s a good thing. If I tried to extract some deeper feelings about things I may end up taking away from the importance with my cynicism.
After last nights blog, I actually feel a bit drained. I know it was because I witnessed the death of a dog that wasn’t even mine, but it still took something out of me. I think the violent and abrupt manner that it happened is what’s creeping around in my head. They say that children and animals have a greater sense of the presence of souls around us. The reaction of the surviving dog was peculiar. It’s just a dog right? Well, for all intensive purposes a dog doesn’t know that if another is being hit by a moving object, that it will hurt it. From the viewpoint of the survivor, the other dog simply got tumbled and thrown across the highway. Ordinarily another animal may try to approach it thinking maybe it just got knocked down. Well, the other dog had no reason to approach the dead one because it knew that the body of the other dog wasn’t carrying what it once was. The immediate crying and howling was all the evidence I needed to completely believe that there’s something more to the story. With all of us. With all living things.
When I die, I wonder what people will think of me. Will they feel bad because they are obligated to, or because I was truly something good in their life. Will my legacy on earth be lived in vain, or will I have taken advantage of every opportunity I have here for everyone else? Regardless of the actual reason we are here, I get frustrated to think that everyday that passes is one less day I have to do what I want. Being immersed in a life such that we are living makes it quite difficult to walk away from it all and start something new. I have a small piece inside of me that wants to finish flight school, sell off everything I possibly can and start living a life that can be inspiring or uplifting for others. I want to travel. I want to sail. I want to fly. And I want others to do the same.